MY MOTHER IS NO MORE

NOTHING HAVE CHANGED IN THIS WORLD,LIFE IS NORMAL AS USUAL ,NONE OF THE ACTIVITY'S OF NATURE HAVE GONE WRONG,ONLY SHE IS NOT THERE.
MY MOTHER IS NO MORE.

SHE BREATHED HER LAST ON 27TH SEPT MONDAY 5.30 EVENING (AS PER MEDICAL REPORT).
I AM UPSET NOT BECAUSE OF HER DEATH SINCE ONE HAS TO GO AS AND WHEN CALL COMES AND THAT TRUTH IS ACCEPTABLE ALL OVER THE GLOBE BUT AM TERRIBLY DISTURBED AND SADDEN THE WAY SHE DYED.
TO ME SHE WAS KILLED BY DOCTORS JUST BECAUSE OF NEGLIGENCE'S AND LACK OF KNOWLEDGE ALSO FOR MONEY.
WE SONS ARE ALSO RESPONSIBLE AS WE COULD NOT OFFER HER BEST TREATMENT,COULD NOT AFFORD HER TO PUT IN A BEST HOSPITAL.
AS LONG I LIVE HER SUFFERINGS WILL BE ALWAYS IN MY MIND,SUCH PAINFUL END YET SHE NEITHER COMPLAINED NOR SPOKE A WARD.
NOW I AM ALONE ,WITHOUT A GARDIAN,WITHOUT A SHALTER,THERE IS NONE WHO WILL LOOK FOR ME IN CALCUTTA WHO WILL ASK WHEN I WILL COME...................

MOTHER

MY MOTHER IS NOT WELL,SHE IS SERIOUSLY ill.
AS A SON WHAT AM I TO DO!
THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE-GO AND SEE.
RIGHT NOW I HAVE NO MONEY TO GO TO CALCUTTA UNLESS BROW BUT FROM WHOM!
SO MUCH LONE WE HAVE TAKEN THAT PEOPLE/SO CALLED RELATIVES ARE SCARED TO GIVE LONE
FEARING HOW WE WILL PAY BACK! I DON'T BLAME THEM AS THEY ARE 100% CORRECT.
FOR US ALL AVENUES ARE CLOSED AT THE MOMENT.
NOTHING IS WORKING FOR US.
YESTERDAY HAD A TALK WITH JHUMUR,TOLD HIM MY CONDITION ALSO SAID IN CASE MATTER
IS TOO BAD TO INFORM ME,SOME HOW I WILL BE THERE.
HE SAID FEW TESTS ARE TO BE CONDUCTED AND THEN ONLY DOCTORS CAN SAY WHAT IS THE
ACTUAL PROBLEM AND SUBSEQUENTLY JHUMUR WILL INFORM ME.
PREY TO GOD SHE SHOULD BE OK.

GOONI'S COMPUTER

IT'S A LONG TIME WE HAVE NOT SEEN GOONI ON SKYPE AS HER COMPUTER HAS PROBLEM.
I WAS TOLD THAT THERE IS CHARGING PROBLEM ,IN NUTSHELL HER COMPUTER IS NOT IN USE AT PRESENT.
VERY UPSET AS I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW SHE IS MANAGING WITHOUT THAT,I DON'T HAVE MONEY
TO HELP HER,EVEN DON'T FIND ANY SOURCES TO BORROW,EVEN I AM INCAPABLE TO REPAY LONE
AT THIS STAGE.
WHAT TO DO!WHERE TO GO I DON'T KNOW.
ONLY THING I KNOW MY DAUGHTER IS IN DEEP TROUBLE AND FIGHTING FOR SURVIVAL.
SHE IS ALONE............

EVERY INCH IS SAME

I am so surprised to see gooni's graph of life which almost matches with me.
how it is possible!
every inch can be matched with each other till date.
only deference she is academic where as i am scared of study's.
when i memories her harassment during her college days,i really pay my gratitude to her for her currage and determination.
i my case i lost vision and adopted wrong line where as she stuck to her line and goal besides all odds,hats off to her.
even today the amount of stress and problem she is facing and fighting for survival is out standing.
I PREY TO BABA TO SAVE HER ,TO SUPPORT HER.
Tapu left this morning for Bangalore to attend GURU POURNIMA POOJA at BABA'S TEMPLE.

BHARAT BANDH 05/07/2010

To day is bharat bandh.
Country wide bandh,protest against price hike of petrol,gas and necessary commodity's.
Will this help! I don't so and believe may will accept my views.

Tapu is at Bangalore,had a talk day before, she seems to be happy as usual when ever
she visit Baba's temple.
Had a talk with Gooni last night,she only called to say from New york they have moved
to north Carolina and from there to Chicago.
Times heard to believe how she is managing everything !
Baba should help and bless her.

WHEN THIS PHASE WILL BE OVER GOD ONLY KNOWS.
NOTHING IS WORKING WITH US.
THINGS ARE BECOMING BAD TO WORSE.
I AM NOT EXPECTING A MIRACLE,WHAT I AM LOOKING IS WITH IN POSSIBILITIES SOMETHING TO
HAPPEN......
FIRST THING- MY SMALL PCS OF LAND TO GET SOLD,I SHOULD GET AN OPPORTUNITY FROM WHERE
I CAN EARN LITTLE MORE CONSIDERING MY EXPERIENCE AND WORKING ABILITY,GOONI SHOULD GET
HER DUES,SHE SHOULD GET AN OPPORTUNITY OF A GOOD EARNING.
IF ANY ONE OF THIS WORKS THINGS CAN HAVE A FACE LIFT..BUT NOT HAPPENING.
THREE OF US ALL ALONG PREYING FOR AT LEAST ONE TO HAPPEN, YET .........

POSSIBLE I HAVE TO BLAME MYSELF FOR THIS SITUATION.
WHY I AM NOT FLOURISHING IN MY WORKING PLACES ! ARE EVERYONE BAD OTHER THAN ME!
NO ,IT IS NOT POSSIBLE.
ONCE SEKHER KEDIA TOLD I AM REALLY NO FIT FOR PRIVATE COMPANY'S.
WHICH IS TRUE.
WORKING IN A PRIVET COMPANY IS ALSO AN ART,ONE HAS TO KNOW THIS ART MORE THAN HIS EFFICIENCY AND HEARD WORK, WORKING LIKE DOG WILL NOT DO,IT SHOULD BE PROJECTED IN SUCH A MANNER THAT OWNER OF THE COMPANY REALIZES THAT HE/SHE IS HEARD WORKING AND SCIENCER,ALWAYS THE MOTTO SHOULD BE TO IMPRESS THE BOSS,ALWAYS TO BE GIVEN AN IMPRESSION THAT -I AM THE PERSON WHO THINKS ABOUT THE COMPANY MORE THAN ANY ONES ELSE!

I COULD NOT MOLD MYSELF IN TO THAT METAL.
THIS IS A FAILURE,BIGEST FAILURE.
CAN'T IMPRESS PEOPLE JUST LIIKE THAT,WHO EVER IT MAY BE,NEVER COULD ACT AS YES MAN TO ANY ONE.
THEN HOW TO PROSPER!
NO WAY.
WITH THIS COMPLEX GROWTH REALLY NOT POSSIBLE.
IT IS TOO LATE NOW, I CAN'T CHANGE MYSELF NOW,WHAT I DO!STILL LOT OF UNFINISHED JOB AND DUTIES ARE THERE.
BABA SHOW ME WAY.

nothing new

There is nothing new in life,life became a pure joke.
started writing in blog with lots of enthusiasm but everything everything got evaporated just kike that,today i don't have anything to off,daily same story of pain and sorrow.
when sent gooni to USA had lots of dream but today fear to dream as today what ever
we touch turns to ashes.
gooni is suffering there and we are hear,this is the fact and reality of to day.

marriage anniversry 20/04/10

20/04/ IS my marriage anniversary .
I got married this day 1983.
now when I think fill like some what stupid but that was the age when everything was
alright.
life was very simple,no crooked thinking,only hope and dream.
In life have no regrade as got more than my capacity,only now a days fill bad for
Gooni,I am not in a position do do any thing for her.
Tapu also complains but she knows this phase will pass away and we have enjoyed life
more than our capacity,not only we ,there are many who have benefited through us.
To day those are old past,let us forget everything.
Let us look forward ,let us prey to god to give us a simple respectable life,and lots
of happiness and success for gooni.

BENGALI NEW YEARS DAY 15/04/10

TO DAY IS BENGALI NEW YEARS DAY.
HAD A TALK WITH GOONI.
IT WAS A PLEASANT DISCUSSION AFTER MANY MANY DAYS.
REALLY AL OF US IS HAPPY TODAY.
I ASSUME AFTER A LONG LONG TIME SHE IS BREATHING
WITH COMFORT SOME EXTENT FOR SOME REASON,WHAT EVER IT MAY.
GOD BLESS HER AS SHE IS GENUINELY TRYING TO COME UP,THERE IS
NO MOCKERY.

06 / 04 /10 TAPU'S BIRTH DAY.

TO DAY THE SIXTH APRIL TAPU'S BIRTH DAY.
SOME TIMES I LOOSE MY COOL FOR A WHILE,WHEN
GIVES A SECOND THOUGHT REALIZES EVERYTHING IS
UNNECESSARY AND UNCALLED FOR!
THAT IS THE LIFE ALL ABOUT!
MOST OF THE TIME WE DON'T KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT OR WRONG
AND THERE IS THE HOLE PROBLEMS LYE'S.

THIS MORNING GOONI'S BEHAVIOR MADE ME UPSET,HONESTLY
THESE DAYS I AM NOT VERY HAPPY WITH HER ACTIVITY'S.
SHE HAS GONE IN TO SHELL,FOR SOME REASON.
I AM FIND VERY DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND HER,HER ACTIVITY'S
ARE NOT CRYSTAL CLEAR.
PREY TO GOD HOLE HEATEDLY THAT I AM WRONG.

31/03/10 GUNI IS FIGHTING FOR SERVIVAL.

GOONI IS SUFFERING BADLY.
I THOUGHT SHE WILL MANAGE SOME HOW BUT IT SEEMS I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING,WHAT CAN I DO
RELAY!
BORROW SOME MONEY,FROM WHERE!
I HAVE TO MAKE A WAY,HAVE TO ASK SOMEONE ,HAVE TO LOOK SOMETHING BEYOND MY REACH ....
I WAS TOLD BY TAPU THAT GOONI SERVICED FOR 7 DAYS ONLY ON WATER AND BISCUITS AS SHE
DID NOT MONEY TO BUY FOOD!
AS A FATHER WHAT AM I TO DO!
IF THERE IS A FATHER WHO RUNS THE WORLD SHOULD SHOW ME A WAY AS MY CHILD IS SUFFERING LIKE HELL IN A FAR OF PLACE AND BATTLING FOR SURVIVAL.

26 / 03 /10

TAPU REACHED TIRUPUR FROM BANGALORE 10 MINUETS BEFORE,SHE COLLECTED ROOM KEY AND WENT
HOME.
COULD NOR TALK TO GOONI THIS MORNING AS GOT UP VERY LATE,NOW A DAYS NEW PROBLEM STARTED THAT IS ALMOST EVERY NIGHT ELECTRICITY GOES OFF AND NO ONE KNOWS WHEN.
IT IS TOO HOT ALSO,NO PROPER SLEEP.
HAD A TALK WITH RAJA OF BEML YESTERDAY NIGHT,HE SAID HE IS TRYING TO ARRANGE A CUSTOMER FOR OUR PROPERTY,AT THIS POINT OF TIME THIS THE ONLY HOPE,IF THAT HAPPENS
AT LEAST WE CAN SAVE OUR FACE AS EVEY ONE HAVE STARTED ASKING THEIR MONEY WHICH
IS NATURAL,ON THE CONTRARY THEY HAVE WAITED FOR SO LONG THAT ITSELF IS A BIG THING.

16 / 03 / 2010

NEW DEVELOPMENT HAVE TAKEN PLACE ....,DURAI WANTS TO FOLLOW UP ONE OF HIS BUYER.
PREVIOUSLY HIS RIGHT HAND MURUGESH USED TO LOOK AFTER THIS BUYER,SEEMS HONYMOON
IS OVER.
I DON'T HAVE ANY PROBLEM BUT QUESTION HOW MUCH CO OPERATION I WILL GET THAT IS TO BE SEEN.
AT THIS STAGE OF LIFE I DON'T NEED ANY COMPETITION,SPACIALY WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE NO
WHERE NEAR TO ME.
LET ME SEE HOW THINGS GOES.

CHANDRASEKHAR TOLD US LAST WEEK,WE ARE GOING THROUGH A VERY CRITICAL PHASE,THIS PHASE IS FOR 16 LONG YEARS,
12 YEARS ABOUT TO CROSS,4 MORE YEARS WE HAVE TO FACE......
IT'S TOO LONG A PERIOD.
HE ALSO SAID-STRANGELY ALL 3 OF US SHARE THE SAME LUCK LINE HENCE THIS SITUATION
WILL NOT CHANGE VERY MUCH TILL END OF IT'S COURSE.
GOD ONLY CAN SAVE US,WE HAVE PRAY GOD FOR HIS MARCY.

GUNI IS FIGHTING VARY HEARD FOR SURVIVAL,IT IS HER LONE FIGHT AS I AM NOT IN A
POSITION TO SUPPORT HER.
SHE IS ALONE,THAT TO A FAR OFF PLACE.
I SALUTE HER FOR HER GUTS,SHE DESERVES IT.

12 / 03 /10

NOT WRITING NOW A DAYS AS THERE IS NOTHING NEW IN LIFE,THINGS ARE NO AT ALL GOOD,
WE HAVE NOT MOVED EVEN A INCH FORWARD,WENT BACKWARDS! CAN'T SAY.
GOONI IS NOW A DAYS LITTLE BUSY AS THEIR GROUP IS PERFORMING A HINDI DRAMA.
THESE DAYS SHE NEVER INFORM US ABOUT HER PROBLEMS ASSUMING THERE IS NO POINT,
WHICH IS ONE WAY IS TRUE.
I AM NOT FINDING ANY WAY TO OUR PRESENT FORM,GOD ONLY KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN.
MY EYES ARE TROUBLING LOT,WENT TO A EYE HOSPITAL YESTERDAY,THEY SAID I AM
SUFFERING FROM SEVERE EYE ALLERGY ,I WAS GIVEN DROPS AND TABLETS.
IN CRUNCH SITUATION THIS KIND OF EXPENSES ARE PAINFUL.

12 / 03 /10

SOME TIMES I FILL WE ( ME AND TAPU ) ARE TOTALLY MISMATCH TO TODAY'S WORLD.
PEOPLE ARE CHANGING THEIR COLOR SO FIRST THAT IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO MATCH.
WHEN I THINK MADHAB,SAJAL,SUBHASH,MY BROTHERS,TAPU'S SISTERS ,ALL ARE
DEFERMENT FROM US,AHEAD OF TIME,FOR THAT MATTER SHIBU IS ALSO NOT EXCEPTIONAL BUT HE IS
BETTER THAN THESE ALL,THE PROBLEM WITH THIS GUY IS HE TRY'S TO PRETEND SOMETHING
WHICH HE IS NOT,CAREFUL OBSERVATION IS ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND HIM,BUT OTHERS ARE NOT.

MADHAB-:A GENUINELY THIRD CLASS FELLOW.
I NEVER THOUGHT I WILL PATCH UP WITH HIM BUT CONSIDERING SOCIAL SYSTEM TRIED TO
IGNORE PAST AND WAS LOOKING FOR A SIMPLE PLATFORM WHERE IN WE CAN SAY AT LEAST
HALLOW ,UNFORTUNATELY MY THAT WISH ALSO WENT TO PITS.
ONCE HIS MOTHER IN LOW AND HE MADE SUCH HORRIBLE COMMENTS ABOUT ME I WAS SHOCKED,
FAILED TO UNDERSTAND WHO AUTHORIZED THEM TO DO SO,TEST WAS SO BITTER THAT DESIDED
NO TO SEE THEIR FACE.

SUBHASH-: I HAD A HIGH REGARDS FOR HIM,AT ONE POINT HIS BROTHER'S USED TO CALL HIM GODFATHER
BUT WITH TIME THAT COLOR FADED,THEY WERE INDULGED IN COCK FIGHTING BUT FOR ME THAT IS NOT THE ISSUE.
I MUST CONFESS NEARLY ONE YEAR HIS PARENTS (MY AUNT)GAVE ME SHELTER DURING MY LEEN
PERIOD WHEN I WAS FORCED LEAVE HOUSE(BIRATI)DUE TO POLITICAL UNREST,I WAS A CPM SUPPORTER HENCE WHEN CONGRESS CAME IN TO POWER THEY THRASHED OUT ALL ACTIVE CPM
ACTIVIST.
POSSIBLE THAT FAVOR ALWAYS RUNS THROUGH THEIR MIND,AND MIGHT BE THINKING THAT I HAVE NOT PAID THAT DUE YET.
GOD KNOWS,I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN AS YET,ALWAYS I SHALL REMEMBER THAT FAVOR AND IF
GOD GIVES ME AN OPPORTUNITY DEFINITELY I WILL STAND FOR THEIR ASSISTANCE IN CASE REQUIRED ANY,I FULLY AGREE THAT I CAN'T GIVE BACK THOSE DAYS AT ANY COST.
SUBHASH MUST BE KEEPING THOSE DAYS IN MIND AND CURSING ME.
DURING ITC PERIOD THOUGHT I WILL DO SOMETHING LATER BUT DID NOT KNOW IN LIFE NOTHING IS SURE.
ONCE I WAS ESTABLISHING MYSELF I FELT HE WAS JEALOUS,POSSIBLE HIS PRIDE WAS HEART BECAUSE OUT OF THE BLUE A PERSON LIKE ME SOMEWHAT ESTABLISHED ,THOSE DAYS I WAS WORKING WITH I.T.C AND LIKE HIM MANY WARE FINDING IT DIFFICULT TO DIGEST . HE NEVER SPEAKS TO ME ON STRAIGHT FACE.
I STRONGLY BE LIVE HE IS NOT WELL WISHER OF MINE.

SAJAL-:REALLY THERE WERE NOT MUCH CONTACT,HE CAME TO BANGALORE TO ADMIT HIS SON IN
A COLLAGE AND AT THAT POINT HE BECAME CLOSER TO US BECAUSE OF HIS OWN INTEREST.
THOUGH MYSELF AND TAPU UNDERSTOOD HIS INTENTION BUT IT WAS NOT POSSIBLE TO TURN
OUR FACE,MORE OVER IN A SOCIETY SOME SORT OF ADJUSTMENT IS REQUIRED AND THAT LOGIC
BOUGHT US SOME WHAT CLOSER BUT EVERYTHING WENT IN VAIN.
I WAS IN KARUR AT THAT POINT OF TIME,AND HIS SON WHO WAS STAYING AT MY HOUSE MAD A SITUATION WHICH WAS UNPLEASANT AND UNCALLED FOR.
SAJAL WAS NEVER INTERESTED TO KNOW WHAT ACTUALLY WENT WRONG.
THE RELATION GOT STAINED.

MY GREAT BROTHERS : TILL DATE I COULD NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT ARE THE GRIEVANCES THEY HAVE HAD AGAINST ME,
MY FATHER WAS VERY UPSET WITH ME AND THERE WERE VALID REASONS ALSO.
I COULD NOT FULFILL HIS WISH MORE OVER LED A VERY IN DISCIPLINED LIFE DURING SCHOOL
AND COLLEGE DAYS.
I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY ABOUT THAT BUT I TOO HAD LOTS OF COMPLAIN AGAINST HIM,AND THAT
IS WHY WE COULD NOT COME CLOSER EVER EXCEPT DURING LAST FEW MONTHS OF HIS LIFE,WHEN HE FALL SEEK AND HOSPITALIZED. ABOUT MY BROTHERS
GOD KNOWS WHAT WRONG I DID, NEVER TRIED TO CHEAT THEM,ALWAYS DONE MY BEST WITH IN MY CAPACITY.
FROM 1978 EVERY MONTH SUPPORTED FINANCIALLY TILL 1985 AFTER MARRIAGE IT WAS NOT POSSIBLE TO CONTINUE THE SYSTEM.CONSTRUCTED A ROOM ON THE FIRST FLOOR,TAKEN CARE OF FATHER'S MEDICAL EXPENSES,TIME TO TIME SPENT WHEN EVER POSSIBLE,
POSSIBLE IF I WOULD NOT HAVE MARRIED I COULD HAVE DONE MORE .
IN LIFE ONE UNFORTUNATE THING I DID BECAUSE OF EMOTION THAT I MARRIED TO A FAMILY
WHO HAD NOTHING AND EVENTUALLY I HAD TO SUPPORT THEM AFTER MY MARRIAGE IN MANY WAYS.
DOLLAR,DADDY AND JHUMUR WERE DIRECTLY BENEFITED THROUGH ME,EXCEPT KHOKON ,AFTER
HIS MARRIAGE HIS WIFE ALWAYS WENT AGAINST ME AND TRIED TO HARM US.
WE STAYED AWAY FROM THEM TILL DATE.
MY BROTHERS ARE NOT HAPPY WITH MY ACT..DON'T KNOW WHY,WHAT IS THEIR EXPECTATION.

MY SISTER IN LOWS:
HOLE BIRATI KNOW MY CONTRIBUTION TOWARDS THEM.THERE IS NO POINT TO GO ON DETAIL AS THAT WILL BE ABSOLUTELY NONSENSE FROM OUR PART ,ONLY THING HARTS ME TO DAY IS
THEY HAVE TURNED THEIR FACE IN OUR CRISIS EVEN CRITICIZES FOR OUR ILL FATE
AND FOR UNNECESSARY EXPENSES WITH OUT REALIZING BECAUSE OF MY STUPIDITY THEY GOT MARRIED AND THEIR MOTHER LEAVING IN A REASONABLE HOUSE.
EVEN AFTER THEIR MARRIAGE TIME TO TIME TRIED TO SUPPORT THEM IN BEST POSSIBLE MANNER.

04 / 03 / 2010

THINGS ARE NOT AT ALL GOOD WITH DURAI.
BECAUSE OF HIS GREED AND WRONG POLICIES THIS COMPANY WILL GO DOWN UNDER SOONER OR LATER.
THERE IS NO DISCIPLINE, ON THE CONTRARY DISCIPLINES WERE NOT IMPLEMENTED EVER,GUYS MADE
THEIR THINGS AS PER THEIR CHOICE AND CONVENIENT.
I FIND ,SLOWLY THINGS HAVE STARTED FLOATING,THE UGLY SIDE OF IT IS CLEARLY VISIBLE
TO ALL.
I HAVE NO REACTION ON ANY OF HIS ACTIVITY'S,ALL ALONG I KNEW HE IS USEING ME ,HE IS TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY HELPLESSNESS.
GOD HAS GIVEN HIM THE POWER TO RULE,SO BE IT.
I HAVE NOT SPOKEN GOONI TO DAY,THOUGH THERE IS NOTHING TO TALK, NOW A DAYS I AM
SHORT OF WORDS WHEN EVER I SPEAK TO HER.
IN REAL SEANCE I COULD NOT DO MUCH AS A FATHER OF LATE,
PREY TO GOD PLEASE MAKE HER HAPPY,HER ALL SUFFERINGS GIVE TO ME.

MIND IS NOT IN A GOOD STATE.
DON'T KNOW WHY GOONI SEEMS TO BE UPSET,I SEE NO REASON BUT I CAN'T PREDICT ALSO AS
SHE IS NOT IN FRONT OF MY EYES,SHE IS SO FAR...
NOW A DAYS OUR ALL THOUGHTS ARE SURROUNDED BY HER WELL BEING,NOTHING OTHER THAN THAT
EXIST.
TAPU ALWAYS SOFT AND WEAK ,GET TENSED VERY EASILY, REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
NOW A DAYS GOONI IS NOT COMING OUT OPENLY WITH HER PROBLEMS,CAN'T UNDERSTAND HOW
TO SORT OUT THIS SITUATION.
IT SEEMS IT NOT ONLY MONEY BUT SOMETHING ELSE.
GOD, SAVE MY CHILD,I BEG OF YOU.

01 / 03 / 10

HOLI
----
TO DAY NORTH INDIANS ARE CELEBRATING HOLI,FESTIVAL OF COLOR.
IN BENGAL HOLI WAS CELEBRATED A DAY BEFORE,THAT IS YESTERDAY.
IN THIS REGION THIS FESTIVAL DOES NOT EXISTS,HANDFUL NORTH INDIANS WILL CELEBRATE
THIS FESTIVAL( PLAYWITH COLOR),MOSTLY YOUNG GROUP.

WHEN WE PARTICIPATED LAST HAVE FORGOTTEN.

CHANDRASEKHAR CAME LAST EVENING,HE IS THE ONLY PERSON IN TIRUPUR WHO ALWAYS
IN TOUCH AND TAKES CARE ABOUT US.
FEW MONTHS BACK HE TOOK US TO A ASTROLOGER WHO PREDICTED CERTAIN THINGS ABOUT
US,THE ASTROLOGER ALSO TOOK Rs.3000 TO PERFORM POOJA FOR OUR WELFARE.
IN DETAIL YESTERDAY WE HAVE DISCUSSED AND CAME TO CONCLUSION THAT HE DID NOT SERVE
WELL AND ASKED CHANDRASEKHAR TO CONTACT HIM AND GET SOME PROPER ANSWER.
DURING DISCUSSION WITH CHANDRASEKHAR HE REVILED CERTAIN THINGS WHICH DOES NOT GIVE VERY CLEAR PICTURE, TO ME THEY ARE SOME WHAT VAGUE AND DOES NOT LEAD TO ANYWHERE.
ASKED CHANDRASEKAR TO MEET HIM AND DISCUSS .
I DON'T HAVE MUCH FAITH ON ALL THESE BUT TAPU IS A GREAT BELIEVER,IN SPITE OF
MANY BAD EXPERIENCES.

NOW A DAY'S GOONI BECAME SMART,ACCORDING TO MY JUDGMENT SHE DOES NOT REVAIL EVERYTHING AS BEFORE,I HAVE NO REGRET,ONLY WISH SHE SHOULD TAKE NEAR TO CORRECT DECISIONS.

23 / 02 /10

NOW A DAYS NOT WRITING IN BLOG,REASON BEING THERE IS NOTHING INTERESTING IN LIFE
AND THERE IS NO POINT TO CRY EVERY DAY ON THE SAME ISSUE.
I AM TRYING MY CORES OF ACTON A BIT! TRYING TO MANIPULATE,DOING SOMHING WHICH DOES NOT
MATCH WITH WITH MY INSURRECTIONS.
DON'T KNOW WHETHER WILL BE ABLE TO MANAGE AT THE END BUT I HAVE TO TRY!!!!
MY SITUATION DEMANDS TO DO SOMETHING OUT OF THE WAY,ALL MY LIFE WHAT I VALUED THE MOST IS NOT TO DEPRIVE ANY ONE OR NOT TO DO ANYTHING AGAINST ETHICS BUT TO DAYS WORLD IS
DEFERENT,THIS WORLD SAYS - TO SAVE SELF ANYTHING CAN BE DONE.IF YOU ARE CHEATED YOU
HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO CHEAT.
GOD SAVE ME AND MY FAMILY.

18 /02 /2010

THURSDAY 18/02/2010
TO DAY I WAS INVITED BY RAVI (BROTHER OF DURAI)TO ATTEND HIS DAUGHTER'S GROWNUP CEREMONY.THIS IS THE CEREMONY CELEBRATED IN SOUTH INDIA ONLY I GUESS.
THE IDEA IS ONCE GIRL HAVE THEIR FIRST MENSTRUATION PERIOD ALL RELATIVES AND KNOWN
PEOPLE CALLED IN A GET TOGETHER TO INFORM THAT THE GIRL IS READY FOR MARRIAGE.
IT IS FEAST LIKE ATMOSPHERE,PEOPLE SHOWS THEIR POWER AND ABILITY TO PROJECT THEIR
ABILITY IN TERM TO SHOW THEIR MONEY POWER TOO.
RAVI HAVE OFFERED A GRAND LUNCH A AND BREAKFAST PARTY IN A POSH HOTEL IN TIRUPUR(POPPYS).APPROX 1500 PEOPLE WERE INVITED.

I AM NOT JEALOUS BUT CAN'T FORGET TWO MONTHS AGO ASKED RAVI FOR A LONE TO SUPPORT GUNI AND THEN
HE SAID HE IS GOING THROUGH A FINANCIAL CRISIS HENCE CAN'T HELP.
TO DAY HE IS SPENDING MORE THAN 15 LAKHS..............
THAT IS THE LIFE,THAT IS THE WORLD.

HAD A TALK WITH TAPU ,SHE SAID SHE IS COMING TOMORROW.

13 / 02 / 2010

TAPU LEFT THIS MORNING FOR BANGALORE.
SHE WENT ALONE TO R/STATION TODAY AS WE CALLED AUTO FOR PICKUP IN ADVANCE,WE
FOUND A GUY WHO ARRANGE PICK UP ON CALL.
SHE PLANED TO BE BACK BY19/02.
GOONI CAME ON SKYPE THIS MORNING, HAD A TALK FOR A WHILE,TAPU ALSO HAVE SPOKEN.

DAY BEFORE GOONI SENT A MAIL IN REPLY TO MY QUARRY AND ALMOST MADE IT CLEAR
HER COURSE OF ACTION,AND HER FUTURE PLAN IN USA.

SHE ALMOST MADE IT CLEAR THAT UNLESS SHE JOIN PHD SHE WOULD NOT BE IN A POSITION TO
SUPPORT US IN TARM OF REPAYMENT OF HER EDUCATION LONE .
WHICH MEANS 2010 WOULD BE ANOTHER STRUGGLING YEAR.
AS IT IS TOO TIRED DON'T KNOW HOW TO PULL.

I FIND TAPU IMMEDIATELY REQUIRED MEDICAL ATTENTION BUT WHERE IS MONEY!
TRYING TO SELL BANGALORE PROPERTY THROUGH MR.SEKHAR RAJU BUT NO PROPER RESPONSE
RECEIVED AS YET .
HUGE PROBLEM ALL AROUND,DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO US!

10 / 02 / 2010

NOW THE CAT CAME OUT OF THE BAG.
*IT IS ALMOST CLEAR THAT GUNI NOT IN A POSITION TO REPAY HER EDUCATION LONE
RIGHT NOW.
*SHE IS NOT GOING TO GET A JOB IT SEEMS(MAY BE SHE IS NOT TOO KEEN ALSO).
*SHE IS PLANING TO DO HER PHD,WHICH WILL BE IN EFFECT BY NEXT YEAR SOME TIME
MAY'2011.
THE FUND SHE WILL GET FOR PHD PROBABLY FROM THAT SHE IS THINKING OF RE PAY
OF LONES,I AM NOT SURE PRACTICALLY HOW FAR IT IS POSSIBLE.

04 / 02 / 2010

HAD A TALK WITH GOONI FOR FEW MINUTES OVER SKYPE ,NOW A DAY'S DON'T FIND MUCH TO
TALK AS EVERYTHING IS RELATED TO MONEY .
DAILY ASKING SAME THING IS DISGRACEFUL MORE OVER INDIRECTLY PUNTING PRESSER ON HER.
NOW A DAYS I KNOW WHAT DOSE IT MEAN-WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE SOURCES OF INCOME YET THERE
ARE COMPULSIONS AND COMMITMENTS,IT IS REALLY HELL.
GOD PLEASE GIVE HER HAPPINESS.

02/02/2010

SINCE THERE IS NOTHING NEW IN LIFE AND DAILY SAME FRUSTRATION PAST FEW DAYS DID
NOT ANY THING IN MY BLOG,TO DAY ALSO THERE IS NO EXCEPTIONAL.
TWO/THREE DAYS BACK GOONI CALLED TO INFORM THAT ONE PROFESSOR SENT A MAIL TO HER
STATING HIS INTEREST TO ACCEPT HER AS ASSISTANT FOR PHD.
ACCORDING TO HER THE UNIVERSITY FROM WHERE SHE GOT THE OFFER IS IN 3RD POSITION
IN USA.
SHE SOUNDED VERY HAPPY...
SHE IS AIMING VERY HEIGHT,FOR WHICH I SHOULD JOIN SPONTANEOUSLY,WHICH I CAN'T.
I DON'T FIND SOLUTION'S TO OUR PATHETIC FINANCIAL CONDITION WHICH IS HUNTING ME
DAY N NIGHT.
ALWAYS PREY SHE SHOULD BE HAPPY.

28/01/10

I WAS NOT FILLING WELL FOR LAST FEW DAYS.
COLD AND CUFF BECAME REGULAR PROBLEM WITH ME,I SHOULD GO TO A GOOD DOCTOR AND DISCUSS THIS ISSUE TO SORT OUT ONCE FOR ALL.
YESTERDAY WENT TO A DOCTOR AS MORE THAN 10 DAYS I AM SITING WITH THIS COLD WITH OUT ANY REMEDY.
THE DOCTOR SAID-I SHOULD CONTROL MY BLOOD PRESSURE,IT IS MUCH MORE THAN ABOVE THE NORMAL,
I AM SO MUCH TENSE NOW A DAYS ABOUT FINANCIAL CRISIS ,THIS NEITHER UNUSUAL NOR
SURPRISING .
GOD ONLY KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO US.

25/01/10

YESTERDAY WHILE TALKING TO GOONI OVER SKYPE,I WAS BIT HARSH TO HER,
SHE MUST HAVE UNDERSTOOD I AM NOT IN GOOD FRAME OF MIND.
POOR GIRL, WHAT SHE WILL DO!SHE HERSELF IS STRUGGLING FOR HER SURVIVAL....
TODAY GOONI DID NOT COME ON SKYPE,INSTEAD SENT A MAIL SAYING SHE WOULD BE BUSY
AS SHE HAS A PRESENTATION.

CHANDRASEKHAR CAME YESTERDAY.
I TOLD HIM LAST WEEK TO CHECK WITH THE GENTLEMAN TO WHOM ME AND TAPU WENT TO KNOW
OUR FUTURE [INTRODUCE BY CHANDRASEKHAR ].
HE SAID GOONI WILL PROSPER ONLY AFTER 29 YEARS OF HER AGE,ALSO SHE IS SO CARER CONSUS
THAT SHE WILL BE FOCUS ONLY ON HER GROWTH [ACADEMICS ] AND NOTHING ELSE.
UNDER ABOVE CIRCUMSTANCES I WILL HAVE LOTS OF TENSIONS IN THESE YEARS.

MENTALLY VERY UPSET,DON'T NO WHAT TO DO,
HOW I WILL FACE THIS SITUATION DON'T KNOW,AT LEAST MY PROPERTY GOT SOLD THEN MOST OF THE PROBLEMS WOULD HAVE SOLVED.
DON'T KNOW WHAT GOD HAVE DESTINED FOR ME .

TAPU RETURNED FROM BANGALORE,SHE ARRIVED AT 12.45 NOON,WENT TO R/STATION TO RECEIVE
HER.

23/01/10

JUST HAD A TALK WITH TAPU.
SHE TOLD SHE GOT HER RESERVATION MADE FOR 25/01/10 FROM BANGALORE TO TIRUPUR BY INTER
CITY EXP,WHICH LEAVES BANGALORE ON6,30 MORNING AND REACHES TIRUPUR AROUND 1.30 IN THE AFTER NOON.
THIS MORNING HAD A TALK WITH GOONI TOO OVER SKYPE,FOUND SHE IS TOO TIERED.SHE SAID HOLE DAY SHE HAD MONOTONOUS WORK SCHEDULE.
WE HAD HARDLY ONE MINUTE TALK,I UNDERSTOOD TALKING MORE MEANS DISTURBANCE,SHE WAS
SLEEPY,I ASKED HER TO SLEEP AND SHE CONTENTIOUSLY AGREED.

22/01/10

TAPU CALLED TO SAY SHE REACHED SAFELY IN BANGALORE IN THE MORNING.
AFTER COMPLETING HER COMMITMENTS SHE IS EXPECTED TO BE BACK AT TIRUPUR
ON 25/01/10 MONDAY.
MORNING TRYED TO REACH TO GUNI THROUGH SKYPE BUT SHE WAS NOT AVALABLE.
I CALLED HER TWICE OVER PHONE BUT THERE WAS NO REPLY,FINALLY SHE CALLED
SAYING SHE SLEPT HENCE COULD NOT ATTEND MY CALLS.
SHE IS WELL,THAT IS WHAT SHE SAID.

YESTERDAY HAD A TALK WITH CHANDRASEKHAR ,THE REASON OF CALLING WAS -HE
TOOK ME TO A ASTROLOGER WHO TOLD THINGS WILL IMPROVE FROM DECEMBER 2009,
WE PAID HIM Rs.3000 TO DO SOME POOJA ETC ETC..
TOLD HIM TO CHECK WITH THAT MAN AS NOTHING IS IN PROGRESS.
CHANDRASEKHAR SAID HE WILL DISCUSS THE MATTER AND SHALL KEEP ME INFORMED.
MIND IS VERY WEAK,NOTHING IS COMING FORWARD FOR ME,EVEN WHAT GUNI IS EXACTLY
WHAT PLANING IS NO VERY CLEAR TO ME,SHE ALWAYS THINKS BIG,WHICH SHE DESERVES
BUT MY CONDITION IS REALLY PATHETIC.
NO AT ALL HAPPY,DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO US!

WHEN THINK CALMLY ONE FACT ALWAYS COMES TO MIND -WHAT EVER WE ARE DOING ,SOMEHOW
WE ARE MANAGING OUR DAY TO DAY LIFE,THINGS ARE NOT GETTING STUCK,THAT IS ALSO A
GRET THING AT THIS POINT OF TIME AS WE DON'T HAVE SINGLE PENNY SAVING,EVEN THERE
IS NOTHING LEFT TO SELL,TAPU HAVE SOLD MOST OF HER ORNAMENTS,CAR HAS GONE,WHAT
MORE!
MINE AND TAPUS EXPENSES ARE MINIMAL,WE ARE TRYING OUR BEST TO MINIMIZE OUR EXPENSES
BEST POSSIBLE WAY.
TAPU IS GETTING SOME FINANCIAL SUPPORT FROM HER MOTHER AND SISTERS,INITIALLY I
USED TO FILL BUT NOW A DAYS I KEEP QUOTE AS I AM HELPLESS.

21/01/10

JUST 5 MINUTES BACK HAD A TALK WITH TAPU,TRAIN IS APPROACHING VIJAYWADA,IT WAS HER CALL,SHE WAS INQUIRING ABOUT GUNI.
HAD A TALK WITH GUNI THIS MORNING ON SKYEP.HAD A VERY LITTLE TALK AS I HAD TO COOK
AND GET READY,AFTER DAYS SHE WAS LOOKING BETTER AS SHE HAD FEVER TOW WEEKS BACK.

TO BE HONEST -NOW A DAYS WHENEVER I TALK TO GUNI EVERY TIME EXPECTATION IS TO HEAR
SOME NEWS ABOUT FINANCIAL ACHIEVEMENT BUT UNFORTUNATELY NOTHING IN VIEW.
DOES IT SOUND STUPID AND SELFISH!
THAT IS WHAT I AM TO DAY,THERE IS NO HYPOCRISY.
SO MUCH DEBTS AROUND US ,CAN'T BREATH PROPERLY,FORGOTTEN TO LAUGH.
TO DAY THIS IS THE ONLY PROBLEM BEFORE US.

20/01/10

TAPU LEAVING CALCUTTA TO NIGHT.
SHE IS LEAVING BY NIGHT TRAIN{HOWRAH YASHWANTHPUR }WHICH LEAVES HOWRAH BY 20.35,
EXPECTED TO REACH YASHWATHPR [bangalore]ON 22/01/10 MORNING BY 9.30.
SHE PLANS TO BE IN BANGALORE 2/3DAYS AS ONE BABA'S TEMPLE BEING OPENED AND SHE WANT'S
TO ATTEND THE CEREMONY .
HAD A TALK WITH TAPU IN THE AFTER NOON.

HAD A TALK WITH GUNI TOO, SHE CAME ON SKYPE,SHE WAS VISIBLE TIERED.HAD A VERY SHORT
DISCUSSION.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I CAN'T HAVE A LENGTHY DISCUSSION WITH OUT ANY ISSUE,FOR WHICH
TAPU IS CAPABLE OFF,I ALWAYS FIND SHE SPEAKS WITH TAPU HOURS TOGETHER,WHAT SHE
SPEAKS GOD ONLY KNOWS.

RA V I ...............THE MAN DYED ON 18/01/10

RAVI.........IS NO MORE.


IT WAS SHOCKING NEWS.
AROUND 3.30 EVENING DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY 18/01/10 WE CAME TO KNOW RAVI IS DEAD IN A ROAD ACCIDENT.
SOME OF OUR STUFF HAVE SPOKEN TO HIM JUST BEFORE HIS DEATH OVER MOBILE PHONE.
HE WAS WORKING AS FABRIC KNITTING AND DYEING IN CHARGE OF HIGH FASHIONS INTL ,
I WAS TOLD HE WAS WITH THIS COMPANY FOR A LONG TIME.
HE WAS A MAN OF 26,THAT PARTICULAR DAY HIS MARRIAGE GOT FIXED,HE WENT TO BOOK A MARRIAGE HALL,WHILE RETURNING HOME ALONG WITH 2 OF HIS FRIENDS WENT FOR DRINKS TO A BAR{THAT IS WHEN HE HAS SPOKEN TO ONE OF OUR STUFF)AFTER DRINKS 3 OF THEM WAS IN A MOTOR BIKE
THE BIKE STRAIGHT HIT A BUS COMING FROM OPPOSITE DIRECTION AND RESULTED TO DEATH......

18/01/10

JYOTI BASU IS NO MORE.
---------------------------
HE DIED YESTERDAY 17/01/10 NOON.
IT AN END OF AN ERA.
THOUGH DON'T HAVE ANY EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TO DAY BUT THERE IS NO DOUBT -HE WAS ONE
OF THE TALLEST LEADER OF INDIA,TO ME HE WAS THE FATHER OF COMMUNIST PARTY OF INDIA(MARXIST)IN BENGAL,ALONG WITH HIM I ALSO RESPECT PROMOD DASGUPTA.
JYOTI BASU UNDOUBTEDLY ONE OF THE FINEST ADMINISTRATOR. HE KNEW PULSES OF BENGALI'S MORE SO OF RURAL BENGAL.
HE NEW HOW KEEP PEOPLE UNDER CONTROL.
THERE WERE MANY FLOWS DURING HIS ADMINISTRATION BUT WHAT EVER HE DID,KEEPING IN MIND
TO RULE BENGAL UNDER COMMUNIST BANNER.
WHAT IS HIS CONTRIBUTION TOWARDS THE STATE IS DEBATABLE BUT HE DID A GREAT JOB FOR HIS PARTY AND THAT IS UNDOUBTED........

AFTER PONGAL HOLIDAYS FROM TODAY COMPANY'S STARTED OPENING,IT WILL NOT BE WITH
FULL STRENGTH TILL NEXT WEEK AS WORKING CASS WHO ARE FROM OUTSIDE TIRUPUR WILL ARRIVE ONLY BY EARLY NEXT WEEK.
HAD A TALK WITH TAPU,HER RETURN TICKET IS NOT READY AS YET.
CALLED GUNI,SHE TOLD SHE IS GOING TO HER ROOM,SHE WENT TO WORK.
COULD NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE MEANT,SHE WAS IN A HURRY,ABOUT TO CATCH A BUS.
ASKED HER TO CALL AFTERWARD.

13/01/10

FROM TO DAY PONGAL FESTIVAL STARTS, THIS IS ONE THE MAIN FESTIVAL IN TAMILNADU.

THIS FESTIVAL CALIBRATED ALL OVER INDIA IN DEFERMENT NAMES IN DEFERMENT PARTS BUT
IT IS NOT THAT IMPORTANT AS IN SOUTH INDIA,TAMILIANS CALL IT PONGAL,KARNADIGAS CALL
UGADI,KERALITES CALL VISU.
IN OTHER PART OF INDIA THIS FESTIVAL KNOWN AS SNKRANTHI.

FESTIVAL OF NEW HARVEST.
-------------------------

GUNI DID NOT COME ON SKYPE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT HER PROBLEM IS.
WAS WAITING HOLE MORNING FOR HER CALL,DON'T NO THE REASON WHY SHE COULD NOT OR DID NOT
COME IN SKYPE.
I CALLED HER 3/4 TIMES BUT NO RESPONSE.
DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THIS GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11/01/10

MORNING TRIED TO CONTACT GUNI OVER SKYPE BUT SHE WAS NOT AVAILABLE.
CALLED TWICE BUT THERE WAS NO RESPONSE,UNDERSTOOD SHE IS SLEEPING.
GUNI CALLED AT 10.45 AND TOLD THE SAME WHAT I HAVE ANTICIPATED, ALSO SAID SHE IS FILLING BETTER.
BABA BLESS HER.

CALLED TAPU,SHE IS NOT SURE WHEN SHE WILL BE ABLE TO COME, SHE WAS ASKING
BECAUSE HER ABSENCE EXPENSES HAVE REDUCED OR NOT,WHAT SHOULD I SAY DON'T KNOW.
SEE OUR FATE , WE HAVE REACHED AT THIS STAGE .............

09/01/10

TIMES GUNI MAKES ME VERY UPSET.
NOW IT SHOULD BE 12.00 NIGHT OVER THERE,TILL NOW NO NEWS OF HERS,MADE 8-10 CALLS
FROM MORNING BUT NO RESPONSE,SHE DID NOT COME ON SKYPE ALSO.
HAD A TALK WITH TAPU YESTERDAY,SHE SAID HER MOTHER IS GETTING OPERATED TODAY.

HAD A TALK WITH GUNI FINALLY.
SHE IS DOWN WITH FEVER.
SEEMS SHE HAS HIGH FEVER, SHE HAD TO PUT WET CLOTH ON HER FORE HEAD.
SHE SLEPT OFF AFTER APPLYING WET CLOTH ON HER FORE HEAD.
SHE SAID SHIFTING HAVE TAKEN ITS TOOL.
WHAT I SHOULD I DO AT THIS HOUR!I AM A HELPLESS MAN ,HANDS ARE TIED..

FOR A LONG TIME I KEPT ONE FEAR IN MY MIND,WHICH I EXPRESS AT THIS HOUR........
DURING MY ITC PERIOD ONE NIGHT I WAS TRAVELING BY TRAIN,ONE FATHER AND DAUGHTER
WAS IN MY COOP,BY SEEING THEM ONE CAN REALIZE THEY ARE POOR.
IN THE MIDNIGHT I WOKE UP AND SOW ONE GUY TRYING TO BE PHYSICAL WITH THE GIRL,I COULD
HEAR THAT GUY WAS TELLING -I KNOW YOUR ACTIVITY'S ETC ETC..AND FINALLY FORCED THE
GIRL TO COMPROMISE AND MADE HER GO TOWARDS BATH ROOM.

THE POINT BOTHERED ME IS FINANCIAL INSECURITY IS SUCH A THING IN LIFE PEOPLE BECOMES HELPLESS.

I NEVER TRIED TO ASSESS ABOUT THAT GIRL.

DON'T KNOW WHY HOLE NIGHT I COULD ONT SLEEP WELL, WAS THINKING ABOUT THE HELPLESS POOR FATHER,WHO MIGHT NOT HAVE SLEPT,OR COULD UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON YET COULD NOT PROTECT HIS CHILD.
WHICH FATHER WANTS TO HAVE A SITUATION WHERE HIS CHILD BEING TOSSED.

I DON'T KNOW WHY THAT SEEN I COULD NOT FORGET TILL DATE.

WHY LIFE IS SO HEARD!WHY CHILDREN SUFFERS FOR THEIR PARENTS INABILITY AND FINANCIAL
PROBLEM,GOD IS GREAT EVERY ONE SAYS-WHY HE DOES NOT HELP,IF THIS IS PUNISHMENT THEN
PUNISH THE FATHER WHATEVER WAY POSSIBLE BUT SPARE CHILDREN MY GOD AS THEY ARE INNOCENT,THEY SHOULD NOT SUFFER FOR THEIR PARENTS SIN OR MISTAKES.

07/01/10

THIS MORNING HAVE SPOKEN TO GUNI ON SKYPE ABOUT 15 MINUTE ALTOGETHER.
SOW HER NEW SHELTER/ACCOMMODATION.THIS ONE IS SMALLER THAN PREVIOUS ONE
BUT SEEMS TO BE OK.
DUE TO TIME CONSTRAIN COULD NOT TALK MUCH THOUGH GUNI WAS FREE ,I HAD
TO COME BY 9.
DON'T HAVE MOBILE PHONE TO DAY WITH ME,HAVE LEFT IN A HURRY IN THE MORNING.
GUNI TOLD SHE GOT EXORCISED AS SHIFTING TOO LOT OF TIME-ALMOST 11 HOURS!
DON'T KNOW HOW SHE MADE THIS,REALLY ALL THESE UNWANTED AND UNCALLED FOR.
SUCH HARASSMENT IS HAPPENED WHEN TIME GOES AGAINST.

WHEN THINGS WILL CHANGE!
WE COMMITTED SO MUCH AND SO MANY SIN'S!

06/01/10

JUST HAD A TALK WITH GUNI.
SHE SAID-SHE IS ARRANGING THINGS IN HER NEW SHELTER,ACTUAL OCCUPANT OF THAT ROOM IS KOMAL,GUNI IS SHARING THE ROOM WITH HER.
I WAS TOLD THEY WILL HAVE ANOTHER ONE GIRL ,IN TOTAL 3 OF THEM WILL BE
SHARING THE ROOM.
GUNI IS STILL LIKE A CHILD,SHE IS SO SOBER THAT PEOPLE TAKES HER AS SIMPLE TARGET.
NOW A DAYS GIRLS ARE SO CUNNING,POSSIBLE TO DAYS WORLD DEMANDS SOME SORTS OF CALCULATIVE MINDED PEOPLE OTHER WISE SURVIVAL IS DIFFICULT.
WE ARE SO SIMPLE AND GOOD MINDED PEOPLE THAT'S WHY WE ARE STRUGGLING IN OUR DAY TO DAY LIFE EVERY DAY.
SAD,I COULD NOT DO MUCH FOR GUNI,I COULD NOT SUPPORT HER FINANCIALLY TO ACHIEVE HER
GOAL,IF I COULD HAVE DONE THAT DEFINITELY SHE WOULD HAVE TOUCHED THE PICK OF SUCCESS.
AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED HOPES ARE DYEING DOWN,DON'T FIND ANY SCOPE OR RAY OF LIGHT,REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO,AGE IS ALSO GRIPPING UP ,EYES ARE BECOMING HAZY,DREAMS ARE NOT VISIBLE ANY MORE.
IS THIS THE END!
IF IT IS SO ,WHAT I WILL DO,HOW I WILL SURVIVE REST OF LIFE!

NEW YEAR 2010

2010 ,THE NEW YEAR.
I AM ALONE .
COMPANY IS CLOSED TO DAY,HOLE DAY AT HOME,ALONE.
THIS SHOULD BE A LESSON,THIS IS HOW THE LIFE WOULD BE IN COMING YEARS, GUESS I HAVE TO PREPARE AND MOLD MYSELF IN TO A NEW FORMAT SO THAT I CAN WITHSTAND WITH ANY EVENTUALITIES.
TAPU IS IN BANGALORE,HAD A TALK IN THE A/NOON,HAD A TALK WITH GUNI TOO,
THEY ARE FINE.